Emotional intelligence (EI) is more than just a trendy term. It’s the ability to understand, manage and influence the emotions of both yourself and other people. But why is emotional intelligence important when it comes to your mental health?
What is emotional intelligence?
Think of emotional intelligence as your internal emotional compass. It involves a set of skills that helps you improve your relationships, communicate better and handle stress more effectively. Emotional intelligence skills include:
- Self-awareness: The ability to recognize your emotions, strengths and weaknesses.
- Self-regulation: Staying in control of impulsive reactions and managing stress.
- Social awareness: Understanding how others feel and what they’re going through. It’s your ability to read the room and understand other people’s emotional states.
- Relationship management: Building strong, healthy connections with others – even when things get challenging.
“Emotional intelligence enables us to recognize how our emotions arise automatically, without any intention on our part,” says Rajiv Parinja, MD, a board-certified psychiatrist in our Toledo market. “We learn to recognize emotions, validate and manage them as we go through life.”
But why is emotional intelligence important to your mental health? When you develop these skills, you can better understand yourself and others, which helps you build stronger relationships. All this has an impact on your mental health and emotional well-being.
Working with a mental health professional can help you develop emotional intelligence skills. Make an appointment with a mental health provider to start the process.
Why is emotional intelligence important?
Research consistently shows that emotional intelligence isn’t just a “nice to have” skill – it’s fundamental to our mental health.
“Mental health problems are commonly associated with difficulty in regulating negative emotional states, which tend to be intense and persistent,” Dr. Parinja says.
How does emotional intelligence support mental health?
Studies show that individuals with high emotional intelligence tend to:
- Experience lower levels of anxiety and depression
- Recover more quickly from setbacks
- Show greater resilience in facing life challenges
- Report higher levels of life satisfaction
These findings aren’t just academic – they translate directly into real-world benefits for your mental well-being.
Managing stress
Life is full of stressors, but emotional intelligence helps you stay calm. Managing your emotional arousal and negative emotional states is a key life skill.
For example, self-regulation allows you to pause and think before reacting, so stress doesn’t spiral out of control. When you’re self-aware, you can recognize stress building up before it overwhelms you and deal with it effectively.
One of the benefits of emotional intelligence in the workplace is how you respond to a stressful situation. Being able to pause, take a breath and respond thoughtfully will help you manage your career positively.
Understanding yourself
Self-awareness isn’t just about knowing your feelings – it’s about accepting them, too. When you understand your strengths and weaknesses, it’s easier to accept yourself. Once you accept your complete self, you’re better equipped to set realistic goals and boundaries, reducing the pressure to be perfect.
Improving communication
When you understand your feelings, you can express them more effectively.
“Our emotions get communicated very quickly and even before we become aware of our emotional state,” Dr. Parinja says. “Communication is mostly emotional, and recognizing emotions in a non-judgmental and validating way, both for ourselves and the people around us, is an essential component of communication.”
Instead of saying “I’m fine” when you’re not, you can articulate your emotions in a way others understand. This clarity helps prevent misunderstandings and strengthens personal and professional relationships.
Connecting with others
Social awareness and empathy help you relate to people. You naturally build stronger support networks when you can truly understand and relate to others’ experiences. These connections become invaluable during challenging times and help to stave off loneliness.
Navigating relationships
Strong emotional intelligence gives you the tools to handle disagreements, work through conflicts and maintain healthy bonds. These skills are essential for personal and professional relationships, improving your social life and mental peace.
Common challenges
While building emotional intelligence is valuable, it’s not always easy. Here are some common obstacles you might encounter and how to overcome them:
- Resistance to change: Many of us have developed emotional habits over years or decades through life experiences. Changing these patterns takes time and patience. Start with small, manageable changes and celebrate your progress along the way.
- Fear of vulnerability: Opening up to our emotions can feel scary. Remember that acknowledging feelings isn’t a sign of weakness – it’s a sign of self-awareness and strength.
- Overwhelming emotions: Sometimes, emotions can feel too intense to handle. This is where professional support can be particularly valuable in developing healthy coping strategies.
Real-life benefits
Why is emotional intelligence important to understand and practice? While it can seem like putting emotional intelligence skills to work is reserved for conflict and stressful situations, the reality is that they are useful in everyday life.
“Ultimately, the quality of our life is closely related to how we are doing emotionally,” Dr. Parinja adds. “Emotional intelligence leads to a good quality of life.”
Here are examples of how they are important all the time:
- At work: It helps you manage stress, focus on priorities and communicate your needs without frustration. It also helps you work with team members who have different personalities. These skills can help open you up to leadership roles.
- In relationships: Identifying and addressing disagreements helps you resolve conflict calmly and strengthen your bonds.
- In social settings: Imbuing your social skills with empathy and good communication will help you connect with people more easily and build a support system.
How to build emotional intelligence
The good news is that emotional intelligence is like a muscle – the more you use it, the stronger it gets. You can work on these skills every day with these simple steps:
- Check in with yourself: Notice how you’re feeling and why.
- Validate your own emotions: If you find yourself in a negative emotional state, it’s tempting to attack yourself for feeling the emotion. Resist that urge and instead just acknowledge and validate the emotion.
- Practice empathy: First, understand your own feelings and perspectives. Then, try to understand others’ feelings and perspectives.
- Communicate more effectively: First acknowledge the other person’s ideas, concerns, expectations and emotions. Convey your own view second. Express yourself calmly and practice active listening with others.
- Learn stress-relief tools: Try techniques like mindfulness or deep breathing to stay grounded.
- Ask for feedback: Friends or colleagues can help you spot areas to improve.
“Keep in mind that negative emotions in one person are a common reason for similar or complementary negative emotions in other people,” Dr. Parinja says.
How we can help
Asking why is emotional intelligence important when it comes to your mental health is understandable. However, if you’re struggling to manage stress, work on your relationships or improve communication, working with a mental health professional can help.
You can make an appointment with a mental health professional directly. However, if you’re unsure where to start, consult with your primary care provider for some guidance.
Learn about the behavioral and mental health services we offer at Mercy Health.
